Why You Need To Stop Saying "We're Family Here"

Have you ever heard a leader say, "We're a family here"? It sounds good on the surface, but it carries implications that leaders do not often fully think through. The phrases we repeat shape expectations, culture, and trust, and sometimes the most popular sayings are the ones that need the most scrutiny. On today's episode of The Champion Forum Podcast, we discuss this popular phrase, why it's harmful to your culture, and what you can say instead.

Employees Don't Get to Choose Their "Family"

At the end of the day, a company is a business with financial objectives and strategic goals. Referring to it as a "family" downplays the fact that decisions (such as layoffs, salary cuts, or reorganizations) will be made in the company's interest, not the individual's.

Families are supposed to be permanent, but jobs are not.

Bonding with coworkers and creating a healthy rapport with bosses is one thing, but insisting that every member of a team is "family" is quite another.

The power dynamic is entirely different.

Families don't determine how much money you make, where you're allowed to be from nine to five, when you can eat lunch, or how many days you can take to recover from sickness. Not to mention, families can't fire you.

Healthy workplaces foster a respectful culture grounded in reality.

Instead of referring to the workplace as a "family," position yourself as a team with collaboration, mutual respect, and shared goals as core values. Teams are accountable and goal-driven. Try replacing the phrase "we're family here" with one of the phrases below that more accurately aligns with your company's values.

• We look out for each other here.

• We've got each other's backs.

• You don't have to do this alone—we work as a team.

• This is a place where it's okay to ask questions and make mistakes.

• We want people to feel safe speaking up.

• You're respected here as a whole person, not just a role.

• We're a team working toward something meaningful together.

• We succeed by collaborating, not competing.

• Everyone here plays an important part.

• We take the work seriously, not ourselves.

• We work hard and try to enjoy the ride.

• We want this to be a place you actually like coming to.

Application Activities:

1. Choose one new replacement phrase from the list above to use for the next 30 days intentionally. How do people respond? Does it change how you show up as a leader? Does it invite more honesty or collaboration? Engagement? Remember that culture shifts through repetition, not declarations. Make sure that you can back up whatever phrase you choose.

2. List 3–5 leadership phrases you hear often (or use yourself). Examples might include:

   • "We're all adults here."

   • "That's just how it is."

   • "We need everyone to go the extra mile."

   • "Open-door policy."

What do leaders usually intend when they say this? How might employees interpret it differently? What unspoken expectations or pressure does this phrase create? Replace vague or emotionally loaded phrases with language that is clear, respectful, and grounded in reality.